Don't settle

A few weeks ago, I was shopping at a store. Right behind me were a mother and daughter shopping for some accessories. The daughter must have been about 22-23 years of age. The mother was looking for a particular kind of chain but I guess she was not finding what she was looking for. So she picked up another chain and told her daughter....I guess this will do. The daughter's annoyance was quite evident in her voice as she told her mother....No Mom...keep looking...Don't settle!

Pearls of wisdom, I think.....Don't settle.

Now, I do believe life is about adjustments. No human being can achieve that perfect life that they dream of and in reality, adjustments are needed all the time. But 'settling'....that should not happen.

If you are staying on in an abusive relationship, then you are settling. Please, please get out of it....don't settle. No human being has the right to physically, mentally or emotionally abuse another human being. And if you are at the receiving end of such abuse....no matter what excuses or reasons you have for staying on in such a relationship....you are settling for much less than what you really deserve.

If you wake up in the morning and feel depressed about going to work....you are settling again. But here 2 things could be happening. Firstly, the job is not up to your expectations....so perhaps it is time to look for another more suitable job? Secondly, and I think a much more common reason, the problem lies within you and you are just not giving your hundred percent to the job. Yes, many of us don't do a job to our full potential...thereby not meeting the job's expectations and making us frustrated and unhappy....by not doing our best, we are sadly settling again. The solution to that can be best expressed with the dialogue from the Hindi movie '3 idiots'....'Excellence ke peeche bhaago, success jhak mar kar aapke peeche bhaagegi'. (Translated as: Chase excellence, success will follow). So, don't settle either by having a job that does not meet your expectations....or not working to your full potential and thus not meeting the job's expectations.

I think most settling happens because of self-doubt and lack of confidence. Also, to not settle requires guts, the courage to put up a fight and a serious self-analysis. I myself suffer from self-doubts and lack of confidence many a times but I have learnt that the only way to deal with that is to 'grab the bull by its horns'. My thinking has changed to ....Unless I try it I won't know if I will succeed or fail. If I succeed, good. If I fail, at least I would have tried and known it wasn't meant for me. Some of us are lucky to have friends and family who believe in us...who help us reach our potential and who never let us settle for less. I am one of those lucky ones.

Signing off thankful for the people in my life who continue to boost my confidence in myself and who help me to never settle for less and this quote by Nelson Mandela

'There is no passion to be found playing small - in settling for a life that is less than one you are capable of living'.